New York Daily News
A few months after they met, in the fall of 1986, Patricia Heaton
treated Carmen Vargas to a Broadway show - the first one she had ever
seen. It was the hit musical "Sarafina!" and the only tickets Heaton
could get were standing room in the back. "One of these days," Heaton
said, "you won't have to stand."
At the time, Heaton, a struggling actress, was a Catholic Big Sisters
volunteer, and Vargas, a troubled 16-year-old, was Heaton's honorary
little sister. A lot of things have happened since. Vargas grew into a
poised, happy young woman, for one, and Heaton became a major television
star, portraying Ray Romano's wife on the hit series "Everybody Loves
Raymond."
What has not changed is that, in a way, they remain big and little
sisters.
Both are flying to New York from Los Angeles, where both now live and
work, to attend the annual Catholic Big Sisters dinner dance on Thursday
at The Plaza. Heaton will receive the organization's highest award for
humanitarian services, and both she and Vargas will say a few words.
"I've already written out what I'm going to say," Vargas said this week.
"I hate waiting until the last minute to do anything."
In the few minutes allotted her, she cannot tell the full story, but
Vargas will make sure she thanks Heaton and the Catholic Big Sisters, a
102-year-old agency that, although affiliated with the Archdiocese of
New York, is a nonsectarian, nonprofit outfit with offices on the lower
East Side.
"It [the agency] was very, very important to me at the time," Vargas
said. "I was looking for a friend, and I think maybe Patty needed
somebody like me."
At 16, Vargas was a bit older than most little sisters - most range
between 7 and 13 - but a friend at the agency told her what Catholic Big
Sisters do, and Vargas asked whether there was anybody there for her. By
coincidence, Heaton, a devout Catholic mourning her mother's death, had
volunteered to become a friend and mentor to an at-risk girl.
"We hit it off right away," Vargas said. "I was having problems with my
stepmother, who was just 10 years older than me, and it was like she was
competing with me."
She and Heaton shared several things - among them, a love of acting.
Heaton was establishing her credentials, mostly Off-Broadway, and Vargas
was studying drama at Julia Richman High School on the upper East Side.
They stayed close, even after ending their formal big sister/little
sister dates. Heaton, by now married and a mother, moved to California
with her actor husband, David Hunt. Vargas followed and baby-sat for the
couple.
Later, she baby-sat for Romano, and then went to work as a production
assistant on his show. Today, she is a stand-in for the "Everybody Loves
Raymond" cast. "I love it," she said, "and I live smack in the middle of
Hollywood."
Meanwhile, the Catholic Big Sisters was changing, too, by adding and
refining programs.
Although it is smaller and less well-known than Big Brothers Big Sisters
of New York City, which also began as a Catholic agency, it is more
focused in some ways. For one thing, it deals only with girls - nearly
500 - in programs as varied as counseling and Girl Power With Pennies,
which teaches financial literacy by giving girls $100 to invest any way
they want, and allowing them to keep any profits at the end of a year.
One program, Business Women in Training, is a partnership with
corporations that helps girls create actual businesses. People who
attend this year's dinner will find an example in their gift bags - a
strawberry lotion called Sisters Scentsations created and marketed by
the girls.
"It will sell for about $4 a bottle, a real bargain," said Emily Forhman-Jewell,
executive director of Catholic Big Sisters (and onetime program director
for Big Brothers Big Sisters).
This is Vargas' first time back at the agency since she and Heaton left
for California, but she returns to the city at least once a year to
visit. Last year, for her birthday, which coincided with one visit,
Heaton bought Vargas tickets to two Broadway shows, "Rent" and "Nine."
"And guess what?" she said. "This time, I didn't have to stand."
